How do you know you’re Russian?

Easy. You know you’re Russian when… (blogger’s note: you may stumble upon a couple of superstitions here and there…)

You drink vodka for breakfast.

If mosquitoes bite you, it’s because you’re sweet.
Your head hurts and you assume the weather is changing.
You have hiccups then it means someone is thinking about you.
You never wish someone “Happy Birthday” before the actual date.
Someone is talking and you sneeze, it means they’re saying the truth.
It’s a tragedy if you’re 25 and single.
Plombir is the best ice cream.

You are impressed at how epic Russian ads are.
You celebrate Christmas on January 7th.
If a bird defecates on you or your property (commonly cars), it’s good luck, and may bring you money!

Grandma can’t pronounce your non-Russian boyfriend’s name, so she gives him a Russian one.
If you put your clothes on backwards, you will be punched.
You were practically born in high heels.

You used to watch Eralash as a kid.

Comedy series for children

Russian characters in American movies are always mafia or just evil.
You use one tea bag to make two or more cups of tea.
You eat a lot of cabbage so your boobs grow.

Anna Semenovich, Russian singer and actress that evidently ate lots of cabbage

“Russians” in a foreign movie speak Russian with a terrible accent, and only you can tell.
When you get sick, your parents will always find a reason why it happened.
You can never eat anything cold cause you’re either sick, were just sick, or will get sick.
You never kill a spider at home.
You eat sour cream with absolutely everything.
Before leaving for a long journey you sit for a moment in silence before leaving the house.
When knocking on wood you add a symbolic three spits over one’s left shoulder and knock three times as well. Traditionally one was spitting on the devil (who is always on the left).

Breaking a mirror is considered bad luck, as is looking at one’s reflection in a broken mirror.
It is bad luck to demonstrate something negative using yourself or someone else as the object. For example, when describing a scar you should not show it on your own face or someone else’s.
Talking about future success (bragging) is considered bad luck. It is thought better to be silent until the success has been achieved or to even sound pessimistic!

If you return home for forgotten things it is a bad omen, and you should look in the mirror before leaving the house again, otherwise the journey will be bad.
Whistling in a house would bring misfortune to the household.
You only give women an odd number of flowers, since even numbers are for the dead.


      1. I loved it! It’s so true! One of my friends, however, is debating the cabbage thing. She said bread crusts helped her :). More research is obviously needed :)

  1. That’s perfect! Thanks! The whistling in the house part, as far as I remember, is supposed to symbolize wind in your pockets. Therefore, whistling in the house leads to money flying away and, thus, to poverty. Makes sense, right? Of course, it’s possible that another cause of poverty is that breakfast drink mentioned earlier :)

  2. Good one and interesting too.
    Though India & Russia are diplomatic friends after reading your post I realized that Russians & Indians have lots of common.

  3. After living in Russia (with a Russian babushka/family) for a year, I definitely was advised to drink vodka before going out into the cold (even in the morning); was told how great Russian ice cream is the best (even though I think American ice cream is better – sorry!); I could not understand how the Russian women pulled off the high heels on 12 inches of ice and snow; I ate lots of cabbage (but surprisingly, boobs got smaller!); and I ate sour cream with everything (Russian smetana is hands down the best stuff ever!)….. as for the superstitions, I didn’t speak enough Russian to understand them all, but I think I picked up on the fact the Russians are incredibly superstitious about everything!

    1. Well it looks like your stay in Russia was an awesome experience (sweet!). That is why, I’ll be keeping a close eye on your blog – some super great stuff there, Lindsay!

  4. I haven’t known many Russians, but the few I have met certainly loved sour cream. And I had to laugh at the comment about fake Russian accents in the movies. We all know you can hardly understand a Russian accent even when they are speaking English. Those conversations are interspersed with “What?” a lot. And you can always tell when Americans are involved in those conversations – they always talk louder.
    Great writing. Your English is better than most Americans, and more interesting, too.

  5. Delicious post! I lived in East Europe early in the 1990s, and certainly have images of those days, including the Russian I had a few vodkas with on a train in Hungary hanging out of the train door with one hand, shouting ”I love yoooou” to me on the platform where I had just got off, his wife smiling benevolently out the window as she cut bread. Thank goodness I now only drink tea – but I have very fond memories!

    1. Hahaha marvelous! Such a typical Russian image! Were you drinking Vodka for breakfast? If so, that means you’re already 100% Russian, there’s no turning back. Sweet memories :) I love the atmosphere of the Eastern European train.. when I was younger I had the pleasure to travel on a couple of them, and I can say that I gotta lot of memories, indeed! Especially if you travel in summer, it’s so freaking hot, that I thought I was going to pass out or something. But it was lovely, nevertheless. Nothing beats watching the fields filled with sunlflowers and wheat as you gallop through the country-side.

  6. I always liked the one where if you have a bad dream you should stand in front of the mirror, take your pajamas and rub you face with them in circles, counter clockwise! After I did that I was more confused then I was then before!

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